Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Best dating advice; just be you, warts and all!

The best dating advice I’ve ever been given is to just be you. This is much easier said than done. Oh sure, after we’ve polished ourselves off, had a drink or two during dinner and giggled at every joke told, I’m supposed to say my opinion, discuss my background and talk about my bad habits? That’s exactly what the advice means. A few years ago, I shared this lesson with my brother at his expense.

My brother wanted to introduce me to the girl he was seeing. I had heard wonderful things about ‘Colleen.’ We all decided to double date for dinner – it would make things easier on all the parties involved.

Honestly, it would be hard, on any new girlfriend, to meet my brother and me. After going through so much in our lives, we are very close. There are times I feel like I can read his mind. He has a great sense of humor, is very street smart and we have the same energy.

We sat down for dinner and my brother sat directly across from me. Dinner was going well and I liked Colleen a lot. She was really into my brother and was treating him well. Plus, she had a great sarcastic tone. Perfect. At the end of dinner, everyone was feeling pretty comfortable and Colleen mentioned that she did my brother’s ironing for him. Everyday.

I couldn’t believe it and was shocked to hear that he had magically encouraged this independent woman to iron for him. I caught my brother’s stare at me. He was tacitly pleading me to not speak, “I owe you big time if you stay quiet.” I obliged until Colleen let us know that she also ironed his boxer shorts for him, everyday.

He had crossed the line.

I told her, “Colleen, my brother can do laundry and ironing probably better then all of us. He’s so good that he used to iron my shirts for work.” My brother kicked me so hard under the table. We all started laughing. Days later, my brother asked me why I had ratted him out and I told him what others had said to me, “You should always just be yourself!” In the end, my brother convinced Colleen that she was the better ‘iron-er,’ so she continued to take care of his laundry. What’s the best dating advice you’ve ever received?

11 comments:

Char said...

my best advice - relax and have no expectations of the date.

Dollface said...

That when it works it does... there wont be any trying it just happens naturally... xxxxooo and so funny about your brother, haha

~K said...

You know I can't recall getting any dating advice. And since I married young and was married for 18 years I never really had to think about it. The awful part is I am terrified about the idea of dating and the only advice that does actually pop into my head is the advice Ben stiller gets in the movie "Something about Mary' before his big date with her and the hair gel scene. I am so not going to survive d'Estaing!

Themis0307 said...

My best advice: build a solid friendship. You have to be friends, preferably best friends, with your love if you want the relationship to last. Passion comes and goes; you both get old and wrinkly. But if you are great friends that is what will last you through the not-so-hot times.

Laura said...

Char: Such great advice and also hard to do sometimes!

Dollface: Great story huh? Natural is good. Great advice.

Pink Peony said...

Last week-end my boss told me some interesting piece of dating advice....Don't even bother looking for men in this damn state. LOL is that suppose to be helpful?

Laura said...

~K: Its wonderful how your looking back so you can move forward. And, uh, There's something about Mary might be the best advice =)

Themis0307: Great advice and words I live by. Thanx for your comment.

Aimee said...

Hi,
Thank you for stopping by my Blog today!
Honestly, I don't have any dating advice. I have been with my Husband for almost 19 years and I wouldn't know what to do if I had to date now-a-days. I'm almost 36 with two kids so let's just say I'm happy to be married and not have to deal with dating anymore.
I will say this one thing, always be yourself. I think you will attract your true mate if you are true to who you are...
Take care,
Aimee

valentine said...

oh my goodness. i am so glad i am done dating! just all the back and forth, is it too soon? where is this going?

being married is like "yes. we like each other. lets move on" :)

Trouble.Thinks said...

I was told to never settle. Figure out what you want, what you are willing to and not willing to sacrifice and stick with it. Never settle. Life is too short to be unhappy...

I wish I could iron. Does your brother or Colleen do long distance ironing?!!!!! ;)

Alexander said...

I think there's so many pre-conceived notions and advice out there that it can be almost overwhelming.

I agree with your stance, which is to be yourself. People have been getting together for thousands of years...before Cosmo or FHM started dishing out '10 ways to get your man/woman' articles...so we're equipped with everything we need already i think!

All I would say is be as relaxed as you can when you get there i.e. if you might have to rush to get there on time, push it back a half-hour. That's about it from me!