Monday, November 16, 2009

Should men wear engagement rings?

I have been struggling with a question that I hope you can answer. Generally speaking, why don’t men wear engagement rings? Future brides wear a ring to show that they’re almost taken. Other then his word, what does a man have to show that he’s engaged? Well for one thing, an empty bank account for purchasing that amazing engagement ring, but what else?

The other night Honey and I went out for drinks with his sister to a lovely SF wine bar. The place was packed so we sat on the same bench as another couple. Out of nowhere the man, not the woman, asked if we were newly engaged. I giggled and answered, “Yes how did you know? He stated, “I knew because your ring is so shiny that I can’t stop looking at it.”

My theory is that planning a wedding can be very time consuming and stressful, a gorgeous ring is a wonderful reminder of why your going through the stress.

Unfortunately I’ve had engaged friends that didn’t make it to alter. They made the right decision to not marry that person. But did they give their engagement rings back? Well one did and two others didn’t. According to Wikipedia: “In some states of the United States, engagement rings are considered "conditional gifts" under the legal rules of property. This is an exception to the general rule that gifts cannot be revoked once properly given.”

“The story of men’s engagement ring history is far shorter. For centuries, only women received either engagement or wedding rings, but today the vast majority of men wear wedding rings, and an increasing number also receive engagement rings. This trend began during World War II, when many men were faced with years separated from their loved ones, and simple rings served as reminders about the people they’d left behind."

I love this background information about the history of engagement rings, don’t you? Comment below and tell if you would wear or want your partner to wear a man-gagement ring?

22 comments:

Laura Trevey said...

Absolutely they should wear them! They are "taken" too :)

xo Laura

** Stop by Bright, Bold, and Beautiful for a little Holiday gift!

~Kenny said...

I'd wear one if my my bride to be purchased me one ( what's fair is fair right?) of course a simple band would do for me. That being said even if I didn't have one I would not consider myself any less taken, so no strippers for me at my bachelor party (yeah sorry guys Im boring). There is an interesting twist here I would like to add though. An interesting but sad truth is I got hit on way more when I wore a wedding ring than I ever did without one.

Char said...

mmmmmmmmmm, i like the idea of a commitment ring. i'm not sure how i feel about as my husband did not remove his wedding ring until the day he moved out of the house - regardless of the fact that he was carrying on an affair with a mutual friend previous to that day.

in other words, to me - commitment is in the heart and can never be stopped or started by just a ring.

Joanie M said...

An engagement ring for the man might be a good idea. Although, I found out (the hard way) that a ring doesn't stop women from being with a married (or engaged) man.

I received my engagement ring as a birthday gift. It was a gift. I would never have given it back. And since we split up 26 years after I received it, the point was moot. lol

I gave my engagement ring (a teeny teeny chip of a diamond) and my wedding ring to my daughter and she used them for a down payment on a car.

Julie said...

I've always secretly wondered if guys should wear engagement rings! I don't see why not! I kinda like the idea!

Juggling Thoughts said...

It's all about the girl! Guys enjoy showing off their new ring when they get married.

Laura said...

Laura Trevey: Great comment thanx sweetie!

~Kenny: I agree K. Being taken is not sign that your taken, but to the outside world it is.

Laura said...

Char: Thank you so much for sharing with us and yes it is all in the heart and in the commitment. I'm sorry you had to go through all of that!

Laura said...

Joanie M: Isn't it amazing how things work out? I have also given the same advice as to give it back.

Laura said...

Julie: Great minds honey....

Laura said...

Juggling thoughts: True, true. I hope you enjoyed this food for thought?!

bridechic said...

This might be an upcoming trend on the horizon. Intresting concept. By the way Laura, I just found Muni Diaries. Awesome. Keep up the great work.

Anna said...

I've been hearing alot about this lately! I agree and think that men should wear them, too. Women do so why shouldn't they. But I agree with Kenny, it should be purchased by the lady!

Happy you found my blog! Love yours :)

DesBisoux said...

dude...the day i find a guy crazy enough to give ME an engagement ring, i'll pretty much let him decide if he wants one or not. cuz i'll be too busy looking at my shining new friend!!

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John Christopher said...

I know that engagement rings for men have become more of the norm in Europe as of late, and I think it's fantastic!

I'd love to have a ring to show off my engagement... men could use a little symbolic bling in their lives!

Cheers from Seattle,
Emerald Dandy

Engagement Rings said...
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Engagement Rings said...
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Jennifer said...

What an interesting market that would be. After all, women's engagement rings dont look like wedding bands, so neither should a man's engagement ring. A whole new concept of a ring needs to be designed! Perhaps then the trend would really catch on.

Aimee @ Ain't Yo Mama's Blog said...

Great post! As soon as my now-husband and I bought our wedding bands, he put his on as his engagement ring. He wore it for about 8 months before our actual wedding. It confused some people, but when he explained it was his engagement ring, no one reall batted an eye. Of course, living in SF at the time, there's not a whole lot of eye-batting at anything. =)

We're also both feminists, so we felt it was ridiculous that only women wear a ring.

-Aimee

Aalina Eden said...

I like this topic. of course men can wear engagement rings because this is the memorable thing can be worn everyone

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Engagement Rings said...

Every girl dream of engagement ring and want their engagement ring to be different and unique. There are varieties of engagement rings but diamond engagement rings are very popular because diamonds are forever and have the glitter to attract women